Updated: Jun 30
There is an old saying, “We always get more of what we are grateful for”.
If we survived all the kinky, decadent debaucheries and fantasies, dressing up, and partying for Halloween; then November is the perfect time to reflect on Gratitude, both left over from Thanksgiving but also looking forward to a time of remembrance on November 11th.
Many people report wanting to have more sex, better sex, and deeper intimacy in their lives.
Oftentimes in our relationships, we will start to take our partners for granted, not necessarily on purpose, but just because these things tend to happen over time. The “little things” that we used to do, such as making that special coffee for the person who was amazing enough to spend the night, often become forms of expectation. When we start to expect the gifts that were at one point freely given, we are in danger of taking our partners for granted. When we take our partners for granted, we miss out on opportunities to express Gratitude.
When we reach out to our loved ones for sex, intimacy, and connection, how we respond to that gift is just as important as to how we seek it out. When we express Praise, Gratitude, Appreciation, and Admiration, both partners are likely to feel even more connected and feel like their efforts are even more appreciated. If I go out of my way to help one of my friends and they express sincere appreciation and gratitude, I would be more likely to go out of my way to help the same friend again. Intimate relationships are no different. The more gratitude and appreciation we express, the more satisfying those relationships become.
We can sometimes let gratitude and appreciation slip...
Oftentimes we get caught up in our lives, we get busy with work, we get busy with kids, everything in life seems to become more and more difficult, more and more stressful, and even with the best intentions, we can sometimes let gratitude and appreciation slip. The opposite of gratitude is taking someone for granted. Once we start to take someone for granted, we will start to lose them and the relationship will start to deteriorate.
As we said on the farm growing up, “It is important to express gratitude for that which you are grateful for! Otherwise what is the point?”
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