Unfortunately, and perhaps somewhat ironically, one of the best ways to kill a sex drive and a sex life, is when trying to conceive.
Many couples can find the process of trying to conceive when they’re attempting to have children to be very stressful, especially when things do not go as planned. For many parents, children just seem to kind of happen, and seems to happen best when we are not planning for them, or under the influence.
What happens when couples are struggling to conceive?
However, what happens when this is no longer the case? What happens when parents are struggling to conceive in the bedroom and then start planning to have sex? Finding the best times to have sex? And even monitoring ovulation?
Many clients will report the deterioration that planning sex will have on the couple’s intimate relationship. The more stressful the attempt at conceiving, the less fun and satisfaction is reported in the bedroom. In fact, when things become overly stressful, couples will start to avoid the bedroom, so they can start to avoid the stress and flood of emotions that come with “another failed attempt” to conceive in the bedroom.
When this occurs, many couples will start to feel like they’re avoiding each other, or being rejected.
Feeling of shame, guilt, grief, and sadness increase. All of these emotions make going back to the bedroom even that much more difficult and cause a snowball effect where, even after conceiving, many clients will find it even more difficult to go back to the bedroom afterwards. Many clients will report that sex is no longer fun, that it felt like a chore, that there were high levels of pressure to have sex, and that it caused a great deal of anxiety, sadness, and depression.
Sex therapy is an excellent way to help couples recapture the bedroom...
... and reclaim some of the relaxation, joy, happiness, and satisfaction that they historically discovered in the bedroom. If you have been having difficulty conceiving in the bedroom, or if any of this sounds familiar, then we encourage you to reach out, so that we can work through this together, and help you reclaim the bedroom. Although, perhaps another irony, is that if clients do manage to conceive, there is usually no better way to kill fun in the bedroom than having a brand-new baby….
As we said on the farm, sometimes you just can’t win.
You wish for rain, you get heat;
You wish for heat, you get snow;
You wish for less snow, you get more snow.
So just try to have a little fun while you can…
Come heal, grow and create together
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